TSA 3D body scan

Are you outraged by those TSA 3D body scans, America?

This week, the TSA has implemented a full body scan machine at Salt Lake International airport as a security alternative to ye olde time metal detectors. Some people are worried that these blurry 3D images of their flabby bodies will somehow end up on the internet. (First photo in their friend's SpringBreak09! facebook album.) Middle aged women and other nervous nellies love this idea, claiming that it's "safer to have a look underneath the clothing." Yet another unnecessary invasion of privacy by the government, or an important step in keeping our airspace safe? Either way, there are going to be thousands of Mormon nudes taken tomorrow and millions by next year.

corporate name games

It's official. The Sears Tower is going to be renamed "Willis Tower" by its newest owner.

"Having our name associated with Chicago's most iconic structure underscores our commitment to this great city, and recognizes Chicago's importance as a major financial hub and international business center," said Joseph J. Plumeri, chairman and chief executive officer of Willis Group Holdings.

Really? Worst statement ever, for a few reasons.
Although Chicago plays an important role as an "international business center", it is perhaps the most historic city in the U.S. outside of the East coast. Even people who haven't been to Chicago will probably be able to tell you something about Al Capone or deep-dish pizza. Anyone who lives in Chicago will be able to tell you that the city is literally a cesspool of art, creativity and historic landmarks. Not a financial institution.

Chicago is full of famous examples of name-change gone wrong. Or at least not gone happy. I'm only going to mention a couple of these, but you can look more up. Comiskey park became US Cellular Field in 2003. Generations of southsiders and unloyal northsiders who had grown up going to Sox games were peeved. Not only that, but "US Cellular" is about the most corporate name for a company imaginable, and that doesn't fit in nicely with the wholesome All-American baseball thing. Marshall Fields, a company with so much history in Chicago it'll make your head spin, was finally changed to "Macy's" in 2006. There were petitions, protests, and probably even facebook groups about this. Do they still have the Frango mints?


I understand that Sears has been out of the building for about ten years now, but the name still holds extraordinary value to the real estate. If nothing else, this is a bad business move on Mr. Plumeri's part. And I guarantee you, the preconceived notion of these executives is not going to be a shiny one. They sure do seem like a bunch of jerks for caring about their name more than the history of a city they just landed in- doesn't seem like "great commitment" to me.